Last month, I had the very great pleasure to marry Cynthia and Fran, a lovely couple from Connecticut. From our first email exchange, I could sense that this was a special couple—gentle spirits in a sometimes harsh world. In all of our wedding preparations they were kind and gracious.
Cynthia and Fran represented a “dream couple” for any Celebrant…creative, innovative, and fun. Both were reflective and considerate and provided fabulous material to help me fashion a special narrative of their romance and path to the altar. It took a number of years for this love affair to blossom, but as I said in the ceremony, this couple embodied the age-old expression, “Good Things Come to Those Who Wait!”
A special ceremonial flourish was courtesy of Fran, who is of Filipino ancestry. From the beginning of our work together, Fran and Cynthia were clear that they wanted to pay special honor to his Motherland. After reviewing numerous ritual choices, they decided that they wanted to include a traditional “cording” ceremony as they took their wedding vows. Many ethnic and religious traditions provide colorful rituals to represent the union of a man and a woman (not to mention two families and potentially two cultures) in the wedding proceedings. In this sweet ritual, the mothers of our bride and groom lovingly placed a decorative cord over their necks. The cord was symbolically placed in a “figure eight,” representing the infinite nature of the new union—marriage is for all time. Moreover, the strength of the cord, as shown in the picture below, is a visual reminder of the power of the marriage bond.
The cording ceremony is part of a long list of unity rituals ranging from “handfasting” to sand ceremonies. I relish the opportunity to utilize the customs of the bride and/or groom’s ethnic background(s) during the ceremony. The expressions of love and commitment are limitless, and American couples are increasingly drawing upon the traditions of their countries of origin, yielding an expansive cornucopia of breathtaking ceremony choices. So for this lovely experience, I thank my bride and groom, their extraordinary family members, the staff of the Stonecroft Inn and such and Ian Pawluk, Photographer, in capturing the moment.
